How to Create the Perfect Family Tradition

When my husband and I first married, his daughter was just a little more than one. I come from a family that got together for any occasion at all; my husband’s family did Thanksgiving and Christmas.card+envelope+vintage+old+stained+isolated

That first year together, in an attempt to maximize our time with our parents and grandparents, as well as their time with my adorable new stepdaughter, we drove for two hours to his grandmother’s, then two hours in another direction to mine, then two hours back home.

We were exhausted, the kid was cranky, and we ate way. too. much.

Clearly, we needed to reevaluate how we handled traditional family get-togethers.

Over the years, we tried alternating years, alternating holidays, and visiting on different days and even doing Thanksgiving at Cracker Barrel to be “fair.” What we refused to compromise on was spending the day, wherever we were, together. I felt very strongly that my little family (that grew by two more adorable little girls over the years) belonged together. And I started to wonder if all the running around was really what Thanksgiving was about.

Turns out, it’s not. It is, though, all about the one thing I refused to compromise on: my family.

His grandparents are gone; my grandparents are too old to entertain (or travel–they prefer to hit Bob Evans); and my stepdaughter is an adult, who has been juggling families her whole life. So, a couple of years ago, I decided we weren’t going anywhere. Anyone who wanted could come to us, but I was preparing my first Thanksgiving dinner.
And they came. My parents, my brother and his family, my stepdaughter and her boyfriend, and us. I have never been the dinner party, entertaining person. But I adore putting out a huge dinner, serving dessert and hors d’oeuvres, and planning family activities. I think what I learned, with all the traveling and the stress, was that traditions are important. But flexibility is even more important. And the people you love? Most important ingredient of all.

[cryout-multi][cryout-column width=”2/3″]Try my Allrecipes.com’s Yummy Sweet Potato Casserole that I make every year and everyone loves! (Bonus–so easy! I’m all about easy).

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Photo from Allrecipes.com.

[/cryout-column][cryout-column width=”1/3″]Every comment is entered to win a copy of Bethanne‘s New Release from Entangled Publishing, Letters From Home, plus a $10 Amazon Gift Card.
Photo above used with permission from Pixel Perfect Digital.[/cryout-column][/cryout-multi]

About Lori Sizemore

Lover of nail polish, pens, her Kindle, and fresh coffee. She likes romance filled with messy, real characters and lots of snarky banter. Reading was (and still is!) her BFF; when she discovered writing she fell in love. Come for the snark. Stay for the story.

Boring is the New Scary

boredThis month, we’re talking about what scares us. I grew up reading whatever the adults around me laid down, and my mom was a horror buff. Stephen King, Dean Koontz, Peter Straub. The Good stuff. (Horror shout-out: Anyone else reading Doctor Sleep this month?)

Who’s a scaredy-cat? This girl.

I was never the kid not scared of anything. I was prone to night terrors and listening in the dark, long after everyone else went to bed, for creaks and whispers. Which, actually, was more of a heaping dollop of anxiety than fear.

As I got older, the things keeping me up at night stopped being faceless monsters and turned into worries like, Do we have enough in savings if something terrible happened? or How would I raise the kids alone if my husband had an accident? Scary, grown-up stuff.

What if nothing happens?

Then, after some soul-searching and crazy living, I realized my own deepest fear was being mundane. What if I never do anything magnificent? What if I never get to stand at some random podium and thank the people in my life because everyone else in the room is applauding me? Are there awards for being really good at assisting in the creation of 2nd grade science projects? I just can’t imagine that fitting on a trophy.

Am I being a total drag and ruining good-time, scary month for everyone else?

At some point, I realized the monsters are actually people and the enemy is time and maybe-tomorrow. Thing is, I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one. I have a sneaking suspicion that tons of people feel this way. They see time slipping by as nothing great happens. They wonder if they’re up to the task of… an interesting life.

Don’t get me wrong–I wouldn’t trade my kids, or my husband, or worrying about which laundry detergent gives me the best value for the world. Not even for a room full of strangers tossing roses at my feet.

It’s just… these are the things that keep me up at night. And so, I’ll read about a spunky heroine rebelling against societal norms or a recovering alcoholic defying the supernatural for a second chance at life. Because those stories, those endings and victories, make me believe.  My day will come.

How about you?

Sure, the zombie apocalypse if crazy scary, but what every day concern scares you? Don’t forget, one winner will be chosen at random this month from all the comments to win an e-copy of Sutton Fox‘s romantic suspense, Beyond the Winner’s Circle plus a $10 Amazon Gift Card!

About Lori Sizemore

Lover of nail polish, pens, her Kindle, and fresh coffee. She likes romance filled with messy, real characters and lots of snarky banter. Reading was (and still is!) her BFF; when she discovered writing she fell in love. Come for the snark. Stay for the story.

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